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It’s clear that the year old MSU Women & Gender Equity Network is settling comfortably into the fabrics of the campus. From November 16 to 20 WGEN ran a weeklong campaign for Trans Visibility Week. Events revolved around awareness, acceptance and the promotion of open discussion.
Hayley Regis, WGEN coordinator, is enthusiastic about the support.
“Last year we ran a little event on trans visibility, trans programs and trans rights, but that was only a pilot. This year we wanted to do something on a larger scale,” she said.
The week opened with events like Trans Archive and mini information sessions geared towards teaching people how to be better allies.
“I want people to know what trans is,” explained Regis. “I did Welcome Week training and a lot of people didn’t know that being trans is not a sexuality. We want to be able to explain things to people who have never been exposed to this kind of stuff before, making it accessible while still doing advocacy.”
Monday ended with a screening of the Marsha P. Johnson documentary ‘Pay It No Mind.’ This is not the only movie made in the name of revolutionary trans activist Johnson; The 2015 film Stonewall has been critiqued for promoting cis-whitewashing, a topic of conversation that came up in the discussion period after the viewing. “A lot of people who came out were already engaged in conversations about trans identity,” gearing the event more to those already immersed and familiar with the community.
Wednesday’s activities largely revolved around self-care, with activities such as yoga and a storytelling circle. Friday featured a talk with a talk from keynote speaker Dr. Carys Masserella. Dr. Masserella leads the team of physicians at the Quest Community Health Centre, a care clinic specifically for transfolk located in St. Catherine’s.
“I think people from a lot of different areas of McMaster would be interested in seeing a talk by someone that works as a doctor but works as a doctor that runs one of the only specialized clinics in Canada.”
The week ended with a vigil for those who have passed in acts of hate and anti-trans violence. Candles were decorated in the WGEN office before hand, sparkles and markers strewn about by those who walked in to show their support.
Moving forward, Regis hopes to have similar events sprinkled throughout the year.
“While we have the underying rhetoric of supporting survivors and transfolk and anyone really, we are working towards showing that more outwardly.”
Downsizing to a single day or hour of events instead of a whole week would allow for more frequent events as well as the potential for repetition of the events that garnered the most support. For Regis, she would love to see have another viewing of ‘Pay It Forward,” her favourite event in what was a successful week of advocacy by WGEN.
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By: Gabi Herman
As November sets in and the weather gets dreary and grey, the Queer Students Community Centre hopes to bring a rainbow of colour with this year’s MacPride festivities.
The QSCC office is tucked away in a back corner of MUSC to maintain student privacy, but MacPride is the QSCC’s week to be unabashedly public. Fourth-year Social Work student and QSCC coordinator Emily Smith says that the publicity of the annual event “brings a degree of community for people who haven’t found it yet.” MacPride also serves as a way for the university community at large to show support.
The festivities began on Monday with a MarioKart tournament and a coffee social, and each day has been busier than the one before. With 16 events, this is the biggest year in recent memory. Smith hopes that there is a turnout to match. “Last year we had about 250 people come, and this year we are hoping for more,” she added.
Interested students have had an array of events to choose from. Wednesday featured classic Pride events: the Pride march and rally, followed by the keynote address. Body positivity workshops, Trans Inclusion 101, a board game night and a drag show are some of the options on offer for the rest of the week. The “Let’s Talk Queer” event series is notable for the collaboration it has brought about. The QSCC, EngiQueers, and SHEC have created three events about LGBTQ+ issues related to sex, relationships, and the workplace.
In addition to creating connections between campus groups, organizers hope MacPride builds bridges between the queer community and students who are not normally involved in LGBTQ+ related activities. Smith said, “People shouldn’t see the word ‘queer’ and think ‘oh, this isn’t for me.’” Unless otherwise specified, events are open to allies and intended for anybody who is interested.
Real goals, concerns, and initiatives are interwoven with the festivities. The QSCC is involved with the “MSU Wants You” campaign, and hopes to improve representation of queer people in student government. The QSCC also provides a peer support service to help address mental health issues in the LGBTQ+ community.
Trans rights are also a priority for the QSCC. The MSU and the Presidential Advisory Committee for Building an Inclusive Community both have committees that are working to change single-stalled gendered washrooms to gender-neutral. The QSCC also provides resources to help students address concerns with university professors and officials misusing pronouns, using the wrong names and other manifestations of transphobia on a case-by-case basis. However, according to Smith, there have been barriers to addressing transphobia on a broad level. “Making that big systemic change is really difficult, because what we really want to push for is training … the university keeps telling us there’s not enough money,” she explained. However, due to recent demand, the QSCC is working on investing in trans inclusion training for its members and volunteers.
The atmosphere in one of MacPride’s first events, the Queer Coffee and Social, was a relaxed contrast to the busy rush of students in the Student Centre. Many of the students in the room were first time event attendees, many with a vision of what the QSCC could do for them. Students expressed desire for more newcomers’ events, excitement for the Pride march, and a hope to meet peers who understand their experiences. Dina Kovacevic, a fourth-year Communications and Health Studies student and a QSCC exec, was glad to feel “a community vibe on campus” for the queer community.
MacPride runs until the end of the week. The schedule can be found on the MSU QSCC webpage or on Facebook.
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By: Victoria Marks
“I’m bisexual,” I said to my high school friend. “Really? I don’t think you are,” was her reaction. This was the first in a series of frustrating responses I’ve had since I started coming out to friends and family. Ten years later and I’m still bi, but unfortunately the rude comments I’ve gotten on the subject haven’t changed. “Do you prefer men or women?” “How many girls have you slept with?” “Are you doing this for attention?” “Are you sure?” or, the memorable “can I watch?”
Since these rude and invasive questions seem destined to follow me for the foreseeable bisexual future, let’s start by debunking some myths: bisexuality is not — contrary to popular belief — simply the sexual or romantic interest in two genders equally. It is the attraction to your own and other genders (plural), not necessarily in the same way or at the same time. It is fluid and complicated, and not always easy to explain. Bisexuality is not inherently transphobic; I’m not interested in my partners based purely on the status of their genitals, nor am I concerned with their gender identities. I’m no less selective or more promiscuous because of my orientation, and I’m certainly not bisexual for the attention or because it is “convenient.” If I’m in a heterosexual relationship I’m still just as bisexual as I was before it. If I’m in a queer relationship, I’m still, I assure you, very bi. Just because I am bisexual doesn’t mean I am more likely to cheat on you. No matter who I am dating, I am still me.
While definitions and identities may vary depending on the individual, the majority of the bisexuals I know have all experienced similar stigma; we are often pressured to “prove” ourselves. The first girl I dated didn’t think I was queer until I asked her out. “You just look so straight!” was the explanation. Years later, my crush was perplexed when I expressed an interest in him, because he was “sure I was a lesbian.” I have yet to figure out exactly what a “bisexual aesthetic” looks like — and if someone figures it out, please let me know — but the result of these interactions has been that I constantly feel the need to confirm my identity.
If I mention past girlfriends or boyfriends in conversation I almost always have to throw in the B-word to reassure the object of my attention that I am indeed still interested in them. I felt an overwhelming sense of relief after I had my first serious relationship with a woman, because it meant that I would finally have an answer to the question “how many girls have you dated?” that didn’t make me feel like a fraud. Almost every interaction that I have concerning my sexuality is an exhausting balancing act, but I don’t feel like I have another option.
Reactions from the queer community tend to be mixed. The ever-hateful Dan Savage — a supposed ambassador of gay people — has stated that he does not think that bisexuality exists, and that we are all either confused or partially closeted. It is therefore unsurprising that I feel the most welcome in LGBTQ+ circles only when I am in a queer relationship. I’ve had friends high-five or congratulate me for dating women, which makes me wonder what they think of me when I date men. The question that bounces around my head is “at what point am I queer enough to be considered a bonafide bisexual?” At what point am I unconditionally welcomed the way someone who identifies as gay or lesbian would be?
So for Pride on campus this week I have a simple request for the McMaster community: let bisexuals dictate their own identities. Don’t test us, or ask us to prove ourselves. Please stop asking us invasive personal questions about our sex lives — be inclusive of the B in LGBTQ+. And for god’s sake, stop asking us to take part in your threesomes.
Photo Credit: Amanda Watkins/Editor-in-Chief
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Tobi Abdul
Staff Reporter
I'm not the kind of person who particularly enjoys navigating my way through sweaty crowds in order to have a conversation consisting of yelling into each other's ears, struggling to be heard over the music. Despite this, it seems that the majority of my mating rituals, as a semi-new lesbian, have been reduced to exactly this. Since realizing that women are more my speed, I've had to sacrifice the cute romantic hypotheticals that never seemed too impossible in the "straight" world.
I bump into someone at the grocery store and proceed to have a conversation about our favourite snacks. Is she smiling at me because she likes me or because she thinks she's made a new friend? "Yeah, I'm really into baking. I bake for my boyfriend all the time." And there it is.
Flirting becomes this tentative game of "Is She, Isn't She?" where I try to guess a girl's sexuality by these unquantifiable characteristics that allows one to give off a gay "vibe". Chance encounters become set-ups and profile stalking, while spontaneity becomes uncertainty.
You may not have a funny story to tell your kids about how you met and you may have to risk a lot of "sorry, I'm not gay" before you hear "sure, I'd love to go out sometime" but this isn't to say that the girl you bump into in the grocery store won't bat for your team or that you should be wary canadian online pharmacy of approaching a girl for fear that she isn't into girls. But in my opinion, dating as a lesbian is a lot harder than dating as a heterosexual.
Tired of trying to craft the perfect message on PlentyOfFish or OKCupid, I sought out this year to meet someone in the real world, outside of sweaty nightclubs. It was then that I realized I had absolutely zero queer friends and that if I was going to meet any romantic interests on campus, I had to make some queer or queer-friendly friends. The first place I thought to start was McMaster Queer Students Community Center, located on the 2nd floor of the Student Center. My advice to all you newly out queer folk is to get involved with the QSCC. They have a lot of events, are very welcoming and you can meet lots of new queer friends and allies. Their annual Pride Week, which is happening this year on Nov. 4-8, is a great way to meet other people. Go out to the drag show and perform, or sing along to the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Once you've found your new friends, you could ask them to set you up. Just be wary of the traps that can happen if your friends are straight. My friends mean well, but once in a while I get the "oh my goodness, you two would totally hit it off" while talking about a girl that I have nothing in common with. Sometimes friends fail to remember that liking the same sex doesn't make you a match.
For the shy and socially awkward, online dating might actually be your preferred source of dating. It gives you a chance to construct the perfect message, backspacing and proofreading until you have the perfect amount of nonchalant while still taking an interest. PlentyOfFish and OKCupid are the two biggest dating sites out there for our age group.
If all else fails, try a LGBT* club/bar, or one that hosts lesbian nights. It may not be an ideal place to meet someone and make genuine connections but there's something comforting about knowing that the majority of people with you, are gay too.
Like any relationship, finding someone takes patience and confidence. Join things that interest you and maybe along the way, you'll find the right someone. It may be slightly harder, but it's not impossible. Try not to give up on those romantic ideas that you may have. The girl next door may be bisexual, that girl at the coffee shop may have a girlfriend, and the girl in your class may be lesbian and interested, but the most important thing is to put yourself out there.
