C/O Pardis Ghaneian
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
The Silhouette: Please introduce yourself!
Ghaneian: My name is Pardis Ghaneian, my pronouns are she/her and I am in my final year of Psychology, Neuroscience and Behaviour at McMaster University. In terms of clubs and involvement, I've been a research assistant, community advisor, Archway mentor and [teaching assistant] at McMaster over the past few years.
What inspired you to become an Archway Mentor?
A long time ago, I dreamed of moving to Canada and studying at McMaster. I was able to achieve that in 2014! I moved from Iran but in the beginning, it was challenging for me to transition from a country with a totally different language and culture. I had lots of barriers, language barriers, cultural barriers, financial barriers — it was difficult to adjust to the environment and I didn't have a strong support system to really help me during that time.
But then later when I started university, I had a great community around me with my community advisors and program mentors and it really inspired me to do the same when I can. That really contributed to me being happier and healthier and doing better overall. I decided to support students transitioning into university or even a new country. I was really really excited to become a CA in my third year with other dedicated student leaders and support my students’ growth and feelings that I had in my first year.
Alongside working as a CA, I really wanted to connect with my Iranian-Canadian community and promote my culture and support international students. I started up a mentorship program within the McMaster Iranian Students Association to give academic and non-academic support to all the new students, whether they're international or just transitioning from home.
This year, I initially planned on being a CA for the third time and I was super pumped about it, but unfortunately, we couldn't because they were closing down the majority of the residence buildings. They offered the CAs the opportunity to work as Archway mentors. I just really love working with first-years and I accepted the position right away. Especially since everything's online, I can't imagine how hard it must be for them to find resources or even learn anything about how university life is.
What did you expect out of the Archway program?
At first, the email that was sent to us was basically saying that: "we're in a pandemic; we have to close down the residence buildings. But, we have another opportunity where you can help first years as Archway mentors."
I've done a lot of mentorship programs at Mac and I was expecting Archway to be a similar experience, but it was more formalized than I was expecting. Later on, we learned that it was going to be a lot bigger and more formal and have a full summer of training for that. But, it's been great! I'm super happy that they did it on such a large scale so that all the students were able to benefit from this opportunity because we have, what, over 8000 first-year students? Even more? If they were to connect only a few people to each of the upper-years, we couldn't accommodate everyone and [that] would take away the opportunity from so many people.
How has your experience been?
I was initially working with one community of 43 students. It was great, but to increase the engagement we decided to combine my community with another one to allow students to find more friends and expand their online networking with other McMaster students. It's been really great to see a diverse set of students from all over the world.
I have students calling from China, from Nova Scotia, some people from Hamilton . . . It was super cool to see everyone calling in from different places and have those connections. I'm constantly learning from them. I don't want to be the one who only shares my experiences, I always ask questions to learn from the younger generations and see what's happening.
What is your favourite memory/part of being an Archway Mentor?
My favourite memory was when we started off this program earlier in July when we were connecting with all of the students one-on-one virtually. Everyone was really excited for their upcoming year and I just really loved that energy. There were also a lot of uncertainties and I really resonated with how they were feeling. I really enjoyed being able to resolve some of those uncertainties about university and connect students who were scared of not being able to find friends, not able to succeed in their classes with resources and others.
My favourite memory was when we started off this program earlier in July when we were connecting with all of the students one-on-one virtually. Everyone was really excited for their upcoming year and I just really loved that energy.
What’s been your biggest challenges as a mentor?
Even though it's really great to have people from all over the world in the program, it's sometimes hard to coordinate times to meet and there are different network issues. Connectivity has been a big problem for a lot of students, sometimes they're not able to even share their video and it's hard to gauge their body language and see how they're feeling. It makes me wonder whether they feel supported enough. I've been trying my best to consistently email them and provide them with different platforms to reach out to, but it's always on my mind whether they feel supported or not.
Are there any possible improvements to the program that you can think of?
The Archway team has been working tremendously hard to build this whole thing from scratch. They didn't know what the university was going to be like. At first, we heard that fall was going to be online and then it became the whole year. There were just so many uncertainties for the people who are developing a program on such a large scale. They've all been working really hard.
Some of the things we could learn from this year are to implement more large-scale events for students earlier on. At the beginning, even though we had a lot of community events, we figured out that some of the communities could be combined to have more engagement. Knowing that, next year we could just start with those larger groups and events to better connect students. It's just important to reflect on what happened this year and what to do in the future.
What have you learned through your experiences as a CA and Archway mentor?
It's been really hard to transition to an online environment, not only for first-years but for upper-years, for faculty members — for everyone really. As I said before though, I think it's a lot harder for first-years since they don't have that pre-existing experience with university and it could feel isolating too as a lot of other university students may say that they found their best friends in their first year.
So throughout these past few years, I really learned how important it is to have those connections and I've been really trying hard to create these connections with our students to create a welcoming, warm and inclusive environment.
So throughout these past few years, I really learned how important it is to have those connections and I've been really trying hard to create these connections with our students to create a welcoming, warm and inclusive environment.
What would you say to those applying to be an Archway Mentor or CA?
I really feel like working as a CA and as an Archway mentor have been a major part of my university experience. So congratulations on making one of your best life decisions! It actually has been one of my best decisions, it's been so great to be involved and I feel that it really helped with my character development.
I grew from a hesitant and shy person to a strong student leader, mentor and supporter of my residence and Archway community. I know it may seem intimidating to take on such a big role in an online environment, however, the lasting positive impact you have on students, especially during this challenging time, is worth it.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
The Silhouette: Please introduce yourself!
Inemesit Etokudo: My name is Inemesit Etokudo but I go by Inem. I am a 28-year-old [McMaster University alumna] living out in Alberta, Canada. I split my time between Calgary and Edmonton, but I'm primarily based out of Edmonton right now.
Since graduating from Mac, I joined the energy sector, specifically the oil field. Right now, I am a pipeline operator and engineer. I was a [life sciences] major. I went into sciences and thought I was gonna do the whole med school pathway.
After four years of gruelling school, I decided another seven was not for me. My parents live in Calgary so I actually moved back to my parents and took a year off to figure out what I want to do. I ended up just falling into the sector because that is all we Albertans do.
What are some of your hobbies?
When I first moved out to Alberta, I knew no one. I was just like: "I'll pack up my stuff and move across the country”. When I first got here I found it a little lonely. I didn't really know anyone and wasn't making friends yet. So, I decided to turn my passion [for] fashion and my love for styling into an online blog.
It literally started with my mom taking my pictures in front of her house, my brothers and sister pitching in and my parents buying me my first camera. That's how it's evolved to where it is now, where I'm really lucky and blessed to be able to help women who don't see themselves a lot in the media and in fashion have someone to look to.
That's really one of my biggest goals. As much as I love clothing and love shopping and love styling, the undercurrent of everything that I do with my passion is to help Black fat women feel seen. That's really all I try to do and I try to use my platform to ensure that their voices are heard as well.
What inspires you?
The first thing has to be my parents, my family and my heritage. So I'm Nigerian and I'm not sure if you know a lot about the Nigerian culture, but we love colour. We love expressing ourselves through our clothing, we love wearing traditional garb that's beautiful, colourful and full of patterns. I believe my styling really evolved from that.
I love playing with patterns and colours to sort of push some of those boundaries that plus people feel uncomfortable doing sometimes. They want to just wear the dark colours and fade into the background. I'm like "Hello, a leopard print mixed with hot pink" — that's kind of what I love to do.
Secondly, I grew up travelling the world. My dad was an [expatriate]. So every year or two we found ourselves in a different country up until I was about 12 or 13 years old. So, I've been able to see the traditional dressing up of quite a number of countries in my lifetime and it really showed me how unique your fashion and style can be dependent on geographical location.
Being a Black woman is a huge influence of mine. Especially in the field I find myself in, it's quite dominated by older white men. So trying to break in and figure stuff out is a real passion of mine because I look around where I am [and] I don't see a lot of me. I've always been the type of person to find those really tough places where I do not exist and try to force my way in.
Through that, I've realized that as much as fashion is important and I love it and it's the backbone of what I do, it's the advocacy portion that I really enjoy the most. Using fashion, which everyone speaks in terms of style, everyone can understand it. I use that as a gateway to discuss more pressing topics. I also started a sorority while I was at Mac. It's one of Canada's first or second Black-focused sororities. So my sorority sisters are huge inspirations for me. It's really cool to see what all the alumni are doing and really awesome to see all the new classes coming in.
So much of fashion is from Black culture and Black women in particular.
It's a very interesting subject that you brought up. For a while, Black culture has been the inspiration behind high fashion. However, when seen on Black bodies, that same fashion is seen as ghetto or unprofessional or it doesn't "fit right”. But then, all of a sudden, you have high fashion houses like Gucci and Louis Vuitton doing cornrows and braids and then, all of a sudden, it's alright, we're fine now. That bit is an ongoing battle.
To be honest with you, it's the reason why no matter what space I'm in, I like to make it very clear that I am Black first. That is a very important thing for me. Even something as little as driving into my work parkade, I'm blasting my Childish Gambino on full blast and then getting out and saying: "Hey, morning Tim, morning Bob," as our 47-year-old white counterparts are getting into work. I really want to ensure that people know that I know that I'm Black first.
What keeps you going when it comes to your Instagram account?
Honestly, it's the community I've built. The interesting thing about myself being online is that being an influencer is not my job goal in five to 10 years. I'm very rooted in my career, you know, CEO of a Fortune 500, that's the path that I'm going on. So my online journey is a very casual one. I don't really care much for the number game. It's more so building a community where people feel safe within it.
Having done that for a couple of years, I've genuinely formed a group of individuals around me who are positive and support each other and know not to troll accounts. It's just such a positive environment that I've intentionally fostered online. When times are rough and for the beginning of this year, I've taken a couple of months off cause being online a lot is a lot. It can definitely take its toll on you. Even being away for so long, I still got such lovely messages. Some people who follow me were checking in and these are people I've never met before. So it's just such an awesome way to connect with people, especially during this time where we're all so not connected physically.
How did you get into modelling?
That was literally just by fluke. I had no plan in place, I was just taking my own pictures. And then, I believe it was Addition Elle. They were really the first supporters. They're a Canadian-based plus-sized brand. They really, really supported me and still to this day support me and everything that I do.
The modelling aspect came because honestly, taking my own pictures, I learned how to model just by doing that. When you have a tripod and a camera and a remote, you have no choice but to figure out how to work angles on your own. I think that some of the images I got as a result of that really showed how I could do that. Agencies and companies started noticing and from there — it just kind of blew up. I wish I could say that I had a path or a plan for it but it was all a fluke.
Do you have any personal goals for your online presence?
Online, I have Instagram, TikTok — that whole shebang — a YouTube channel and a website. For the website, I would love for it to eventually become a place where I can let other people speak. That's always been a goal, to give other writers a platform where I can let them speak about what they want to.
For my Instagram and TikTok side of things, again, I really just wanna show a body that does not look like the conventional Instagram body or the conventional TikTok body. I just want to show that just because you don't look like these people online, which — asterisks, many of them don't actually look like that either — it doesn't mean that you cannot have fun with fashion, that you can't wear a crop top and show your belly, it's okay, we all have stretch marks.
With my YouTube channel, I want to show that a plus person can inhabit that lifestyle. So, I'd do off-shift vlogs where I'll do mundane things around the house, go grocery shopping, hang out, show behind the scenes of some shoots just to show that being fat — and again, I use the word "fat" as a descriptor, to me it doesn't have any negative connotations whatsoever — does not mean that you must stop just living.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
Photo C/O Tiffany Tse
The Silhouette: When did you get into piano?
Tiffany Tse: I started when I was five years old. It wasn't an amazing story, it was just my mom. One day she asked me if I'm interested in playing the piano. I said “yeah” and I didn't really know what I was doing, I just wanted to say yes to things. It's actually a pretty interesting story because I stuck with the same teacher the whole time. Even now, once in a while I go to visit the teacher that I've known since I was five years old.
I was just incredibly lucky to be able to be with this teacher. They're a couple — husband and wife. They've just been very, very good teachers . . . Then, I think they threw me in to compete when I was six. That's when I started performing. As a kid, I didn't really know what I was doing, but I did like it and that's how I grew up loving the stage and loving the idea of sharing this music that I'm making with other people.
What inspired you to create your Instagram account?
I think my first post was in 2014. I just decided one day, why not upload something? But then, when I got to university (I started my first year in 2016), because I was in engineering I actually didn't have time to play anymore. I was accepted to [the University of Toronto]'s piano performance program and they gave me a full ride but I was like "Oh, what am I gonna do with a music degree?" so I ended up choosing engineering.
I had a huge regret, almost, because I didn't get to do what I love to do and when you don't practice, your skills fully go away. So that's what I found during my university years: I was so focused on school and engineering that I kind of forgot about this thing that was really important to me. It got to a point where I would have so much regret that if I saw a piano in public I would almost want to run away from it because I was so scared of hearing myself play or if someone told me to play something and I sound terrible because I haven't been practicing. Eventually, I forgot about how much I loved it so I deactivated my account . . . around 2017 because I didn't want to look at it anymore, I just wanna move on with life.
And then quarantine happened and one of my friends has an account similar to this where she posts her practice and her music and she posted consistently. I saw how much she was improving and it was really inspiring. I was like: "Wow, she's gotten really good over the past few years since I last heard her play." And so it's quarantine, I'm really bored, maybe this is something I should pick up. So I reactivated my account and that's how I started.
I started again around late June of 2020 and I just became obsessed again. I basically worked through all the skills I lost and I just sat and listened to myself sound really bad in the beginning and then picked up new pieces to learn and then just went at it. I started practicing five hours a day because I just loved it so much. It was almost like rediscovering a lost part of myself. Now, I've kind of fixed the whole regret thing. I don't hold those regrets in my heart anymore because I got to do this while doing school. Right now I'm in my final year and I am balancing these two things and I plan on continuing to balance this side of me along with my career moving forward.
I basically worked through all the skills I lost and I just sat and listened to myself sound really bad in the beginning and then picked up new pieces to learn and then just went at it. I started practicing five hours a day because I just loved it so much. It was almost like rediscovering a lost part of myself. Now, I've kind of fixed the whole regret thing.
What encourages you to keep running your account?
Definitely the community of people there. I've met a lot of friends, they're pianists as well, and because I play classical music, I find that it's really hard to find people who love it nowadays. It's rare, but it's something I'm really passionate about. So being able to have this platform and meet other classical pianists and being able to talk about this was so good for me. I haven't been able to just fan-girl about classical music in a long time.
Also, when I was competing in person as a kid, there was always a lot of competition between people. That's also one reason why I didn't go into music — I just didn't like the way people were fighting. Because not everyone "makes it" in music, right? It's very hard to truly "make it" as a performer, so there's a lot of competition between people, there's a lot of rumours and gossip. With this Instagram community, I can freely talk about myself and the pieces I want to play and the music without having to worry about someone spreading rumours or something. So it's a community where you can be yourself and be open.
With a growing following, I just didn't know so many people were still into classical music. I want to go back into performing in person but, because I haven't done it in about five years, I would need to build up that confidence again, so having this platform is really good. I'm not only posting videos, but I've done Instagram lives before where I just played through my piece and it's really good practice for me to be able to eventually make it back into the stage.
Are you still taking lessons then?
Not formally . . . I just learn the piece myself and polish it to the best of my ability and bring it to him. I find that because I've grown so much since I was a kid and last taking lessons seriously, I really like coming up with my own interpretation and knowing the music by myself first and then going to him and then he can pick out some details and what I should fix. That to me is better because I don't really need him to sit me down and read with me anymore so it's more time-effective that way. Honestly, he's the sweetest thing ever. He doesn't charge me, he won't tell me how much he charges. Last time, I wanted to pay for the lesson because he spends two hours with me every time. He just opened his arms and told me to come here, gave me a hug and told me that I paid. I guess that's one of the things about sticking with the same teacher for so long — they're like my second parents. They watched me grow up since I was five and now I'm 22.
Do you have any songs that you really enjoy playing?
I think anything by [Frédéric] Chopin is so near and dear to me. The interesting thing about classical is that there are no lyrics. So people will listen to a song and will really relate to the song because of the lyrics. For some reason, Chopin's pieces, even without lyrics, I resonate so much with it. There's just something about it. I think it's because Chopin really missed his homeland. So in his music, there's sometimes a nostalgic feeling and it kind of reminds me of some great old memories. Even when you're completely heartbroken, there's going to be something for it.
It's also cool because I haven't played in five years. I came back to it and, because so many things have happened in these five years that I've grown as a person throughout my university career, the music that I play would come out differently because of the experiences I've had. The technical stuff is trainable but then I feel that all the emotions and maturity come with time.
What is your favourite part of competitions and being on the stage?
When I can communicate with the audience without saying anything. When you're playing a note and you take a pause and everyone is silent. It's almost like everyone is anticipating the next part with you. I think that's really cool. And there's obviously nerves when you're performing. Being in front of people, there are always worries about “what if I mess up?” or “what if I forget?” I think that these are fears that every musician and every performer has. So my heart's always racing before but then once I sit down at the piano and start playing, I find that the racing heartbeat goes away. It just becomes me and the instrument.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
C/O @alliee.c
This interview was conducted in fall 2020 by Sufyan Rather.
The Silhouette: Give me a brief introduction of yourself!
Allie C.: My name's Allie, my pronouns are she/her, I'm currently in my second-year of health sciences (I'm in the core stream, I'm not specializing) and right now I'm calling in from Ottawa.
So tell me about your channel, why did you start it?
I started my YouTube channel around the end of Grade 12. I've always liked creating videos and producing content, but I was too scared to make a public channel until Grade 12 when you're kind of at the top of the hierarchy — you don't really care what the younger years say about you.
So I just went ahead and started a channel. It was more to document fun memories with friends and it's something nice to look back upon. I guess that just kept ongoing. In first year, I gained a little bit of traction and it's just something I really enjoy doing.
What do you want to get across to your audience? Why is it important that you are the one to say it?
Especially having a smaller following for a YouTube content creator, you have a much more personal connection with your followers. They can ask you questions, you can engage with them and their comments. I think it's also giving me a platform to share my voice and opinions or to bring up matters that are important or need more awareness in society, and just educate some more people about these topics that they might not be aware of.
Stuff is still new for me, so I'm still navigating my way around that, like what's the best way to do it. I don't want to do anything that would offend anyone, but I also want to make sure that I'm staying true to myself and being able to voice my opinions to support the causes that I care for.
It started off just for fun, just me being creative and capturing memories. It's sort of always been like that, especially with making videos, you can definitely get burnt out really easily if you're always trying to follow what other people want if you're doing things just to get views or just to get subscribers. So a large part of it for me is to stay true to the content that I want to make.
I really enjoy the creative aspect of it, so getting cinematic shots, or working on different types of editing and just stepping up my skills that way. Along the way, I like to create some informational videos for my audience as well, like advice to people applying to universities, or how university life is like because I know I definitely would've really appreciated that content when I was a younger viewer. So I try to have a good mix of both with the content I create.
How has your channel changed from last year to this year?
Last year, there was a lot more content with other people, whether that was with vlogs or just sit-down talking videos with other people. I think that this year, I can't really incorporate that "fun" aspect to it so I have to think of other ways or other ideas where I can engage with my audience because I know a lot of viewers really want to see how college is like, how college campus life is like and how you make friends on campus.
That's something that's really different this year because nobody's actually on campus so you have to find ways to adjust. Even if I can't capture memories with friends right now, I'm still living at home with my family. I know that that's something that's not always going to an option for me.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
Please introduce yourself!
My name is Michael Abraham. I am 27 years old. I graduated from McMaster University with a BSW, so [an] honours bachelor of social work in 2017. In general, right now, most of my work is involved in two spheres: running a youth center in downtown Hamilton and working as a graduation coach in the [Hamilton-Wentworth District School Board].
How has COVID-19 affected the SPACE?
Running a youth center is the business of social interaction and engagement. Before COVID, we would have anywhere from 50 to 80 participants a night or even more depending on if there was an event or dinner. Once the lockdown had hit back in March [2020], we had to shut down for a brief hiatus, for around six months.
When we returned in September, we had to really think through how we were going to reopen the SPACE and in what capacity we could possibly do that. What we had chosen at that time was to do closed pre-registered drop-in programming. So there'd be one program for three days during which we were open — Wednesday, Thursday, Friday — and there'd be a maximum of 10 youth that could attend said program.
One day could be Aux Cord Shuffle, another day could be our queer and trans youth programming, another day could be another program. So when that set cohort did their program for that day, once that program was done, they essentially had the entire space themselves, which we were hoping would be an added benefit to those individuals to still also exist in the SPACE because it may not be cool to be chilling at home, things may be not as safe or there are lots of situations with housing and stuff that youth have complexities around. We were able to do that from September until November.
Unfortunately, December was when things were intensifying so we had to really adjust and pivot towards online programming. I purchased a Zoom account and then we're now just doing two online programs a week, one being digital drop-in which there are various different activities or different concepts from other programs we've done . . . Right now, it's been going really well, we were kind of nervous, we didn't really know how it would go.
But, youth are really engaged and oftentimes, the programs go over the one hour that we schedule them as. We also want to make sure that we're not having youth stuck on their computer for an exuberant amount of time.
What are your favourite elements of the SPACE outside of the programming?
One of my favourite aspects of the SPACE is creating a sense of belonging for marginalized and racialized youth . . . A beautiful facet of the youth center is that we want to make it a space in which people can be their full selves, people can unpack things, can unlearn, can navigate some of their pain and trauma. We can all collectively carry the weight of that together.
That's really led into beautiful moments of sharing space with one another, being there for one another and building healthy relationships, even building chosen families outside of people's individual families. In a general way, being a dope spot where people can safely just grow up and have fun, kick it and do dumb safe stuff, and also have opportunities to really grow and develop and be the best version of yourself that you can be.
Could you elaborate on your work for the HWDSB?
The graduation program is a new pilot project initiative started in my partnership with the ministry on a provincial level and the HWDSB on a specific regional space for Hamilton. The title of the role is graduation coach for Black students because the work is specific and focused on Black youth. I am located at Westdale Secondary School, whereas my partner in crime, Chad McPherson, is at Bernie Custis Secondary School.
In general terms, what we do is support and provide opportunities for growth and mentorship for Black students, meeting their academic things and supporting them in overcoming their academic barriers, but also and maybe even more importantly, is having a stake or value in their personal development and growth. We definitely find that when a student is doing well or is set up for success with their personal development, the school follows as well.
What's your favourite part about this role?
A lot of the way in which I do my work and exist in the youth center definitely overlaps [with this role]. My absolute favourite parts are directly engaging and connecting with Black students. I think so much of my own educational experience had such a lack of seeing myself reflected in the administration or reflected in mentors or people I can trust.
I'm really trying my best to fit that in some way for students. So, my best hope is to build trust and rapport with the students I'm linked up with. It's super dope connecting with students and hearing where they're at, hearing some of their own thoughts and knowledge.
The stuff that young people are talking about now is way ahead of what I was thinking about at that age. A lot of the things that students who are 15, 16, are talking about now, I didn't learn that stuff until I was in first, second year of university. So it's super hype seeing the growth and level up of the next generation.
What are you envisioning for the future of this program?
Big visions of having graduation coaches at each high school, at elementary schools. I think a continual buy-in and accountability to the process of creating more spaces of healing, more spaces of racialized youth feeling that they have places to belong and be able to be a part of the system's processes. So being able to provide feedback, being able to say that "Hey, this happened and it was wrong and it needs to change" and seeing those things be done in real-time.
Could you talk a little bit more about your involvement in the general Hamilton community?
In the general Hamilton community, lots of like small and larger pieces of being involved with justice endeavours. I think that's always going to be a facet in some way that I'm always going to care about. I think the foundation of all these pieces comes from hip hop, from that dance culture in that breaking sprang forth from a direct response to the oppression that Black and Latino youth were feeling in the Bronx at that time.
So, it's definitely a continual speaking back to systems and speaking back to "Yo, this isn't okay." I think a lot of that also ties to the work at the youth center. Beyond those small pieces of activism when I have the capacity and time to be able to be involved, I also teach breaking at a dance studio on the mountain called DMD, which is Defining Movement Dance. That's also a really dope opportunity for me to share my love of movement and dancing and making sure that the young'uns are getting the proper knowledge and tips around breaking and the history.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
Morghen Jael is a third-year arts and science student who has been in a relationship with her boyfriend, Zooey, for two years.
The Silhouette: Are you living together or in a long-distance relationship?
Morghen Jael: We do not share a lease but he is living full-time at my house. So he has a student house in Westdale that he has a lease with. But because of the pandemic and because he actually has an immuno-compromised housemate at that student house, he decided to just move in full-time with me here because we didn't want to worry about him switching back and forth and exposing all of us to double the amount of people.
So yeah, we technically live together even though that wasn't what I was planning for at this stage of the relationship. It feels kind of soon for full-time living together, but that's what it is and it's been working.
What are the pros and cons of living together?
The pros were that we would get to see each other. Otherwise, we kind of felt like, at the beginning of the pandemic, it was one extreme or the other, so he's either going to stay or we're going to be apart.
So it felt like we had to make that choice and it was almost a no-brainer: we're going to choose to be together. We love each other's company, we're part of each other's daily lives in so many ways, so let's just get together physically—we can do it.
It was great to have support 24/7 [because] it was stressful with the pandemic [and] it's also just a stressful life period of my life. I just started medication for my anxiety actually, right at the onset of the pandemic . . . That was a really big paradigm shift in my life, so it was actually great to have Zooey there for those first few months of adjusting to my medication and also just adjusting to the pandemic.
So I think for both of us it helps to have the other one around. People talk about loneliness during the pandemic and I think we never had that problem because we had each other. We're really great friends in addition to being boyfriend and girlfriend, so we get along really well, we're good at coming up with things to do.
One of the cons of moving in together full-time was the lack of privacy. I think I felt this more than him, just different people that we are. I like to have a little more time alone in my own space, having solo dance parties in my room to let off steam to kind of retreat into my own world. So lack of privacy was something that we both dealt with.
Even just physical privacy — we have been sleeping in the same bed now for all these months. He'd come over to sleep before, but not night after night. That took some adjusting. I'm not gonna have my physical space all to myself anymore: how can I maintain my bodily integrity, how can I stand up for myself? I'm like: "Okay, this is too much snuggling, I need to go for a walk."
Could you elaborate on how you've been maintaining your relationship?
We have been making sure to take the little bit of personal space that we can. I think that's been really helpful in making sure that we can still tolerate each other when we're together. So we've been going for solo walks. At least once a day, each of us goes for a walk alone . . . Also, on the opposite end of the spectrum, we've been doing dates and stuff.
Every time a monthly anniversary comes up, we'll either order in some food or cook some food and then we'll make it as special as it can be inside my bedroom. So we'll have some music, have a glass of wine and try to replicate a date scenario so it feels like we're still dating [and] not just roommates.
How has your relationship grown because of COVID-19?
I think the pandemic may have helped me to become more honest about my physical needs, like a little more literate, even. I remember using euphemisms to talk about sex or body parts or body functions. In the first year or so, I was kind of like "Oh, I can't tell him about this health problem" because I was a little embarrassed or I didn't know what words to use.
But now we've been thinking about our physical health a bit more. We've been in a closer space so we see each other's bodies more and I'm getting more comfortable being like "Okay, I have a yeast infection." But I'm at the point now where I could tell him that I have this physical problem, here's how you can support me, but you don't need to know everything and I got it. So yeah, I think that's been kind of an added dimension and I think that's also just both of us maturing as people.
Do you have any additional comments?
I just think there are lots of different love stories during the pandemic. Love and sex because sex is definitely an important dimension of this that isn't necessarily coupled with love . . . It's important to remember that romantic love is not the end-all and be-all. People are exploring friendships, deep and new friendships, or their sex lives, their own personal sexuality.
Oh, here's something else: I bought a vibrator for the first time during the pandemic. So I was experimenting with a vibrator. It's been kind of fun to let Zooey try it too, not for himself but on me, and that also goes with becoming more comfortable with my body, with talking about my body and his body. So anyway, I'm just saying that there are all different types of sex and love stories going on in people's lives.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
The Silhouette: What inspired you to start @hamontsalsa?
Salsa Sarhan: I used to have a One Direction fan page and I used to make edits. That's what inspired me. I realized I could take my own photos and incorporate my own stuff. I had a little iPod [5th generation] that I used to take photos and then I realized that I'm actually getting good at this. So then I made my own little photography account.
People started liking my photos, reposting them online and I realized that I kind of have a knack for this! So I focused solely on that. Last year, I started actually selling my prints. People kept on asking if I have a website—I don't have a website just yet, I'm still working on it—but people are buying my prints, which is really exciting. So if you need a print, let me know!
What are your goals for @hamontsalsa, both short term and long term?
My short-term goal is to sell 100 prints. So far I've sold 40, so I'm doing pretty good for the beginning of this year. Long term, I definitely want to open up my own studio and then show people photography tips and show them how to get started, even with an iPod 5. Having a studio would be huge for me, but that's definitely a long-term goal, after university, after all those student loans are paid off.
How are you finding running the project during the pandemic?
Honestly, it's very hard cause I'm not as active as I used to be in the summer, where you could be going on walks and everything looked sun-kissed and beautiful. During the pandemic, everything does feel a little bit more gloomy, especially with the semester being so heavy. So having it as a side-project right now is kind of inspiring since I can relax, know that it's still there and I can always go to it and be happy.
During the pandemic, everything does feel a little bit more gloomy, especially with the semester being so heavy. So having it as a side-project right now is kind of inspiring since I can relax, know that it's still there and I can always go to it and be happy.
Do you see yourself continuing @hamontsalsa when you graduate?
Oh yes, definitely. But I feel like it's gonna be less architecture and buildings that I see when I'm going on walks. When I graduate, I want to focus solely on people and people’s stories. I've always wanted to do portrait photography, but I never got a chance to practice. After graduation, I could focus on different realms of photography since I'll have more free time considering that I'm not stressing and doing school work.
Could you elaborate on why you're so interested in photography?
I know it's a little bit cliché, but I think it's a fact that I can capture things in my own perspective. That is huge for me because I like being very vocal about who I am and what I stand for. So definitely being able to capture a perspective that's mine and knowing that no one else can change it but me.
I know it's a little bit cliché, but I think it's a fact that I can capture things in my own perspective. That is huge for me because I like being very vocal about who I am and what I stand for. So definitely being able to capture a perspective that's mine and knowing that no one else can change it but me.
You can see from the beginning of my feed to now, there was a huge improvement and change in the type of photographer I was and the places I was going to, how I see different angles.
Could you elaborate a little bit more on how you think your project has evolved?
It's definitely evolved with the way that I'm actually perceiving things in Hamilton. It's not just me going on a walk and seeing a nice random building, it's me looking at different angles of that building, now appreciating the texture, the textiles of it.
So it's definitely me growing as an artist and then that definitely shows in the improvement of my photography. Like I said before, like, long-term goal, I do want to focus more on portrait photography and the people within those photos. Being able to grow as a photographer is just a huge thing.
What camera do you use?
Here's my biggest trade secret: I don't use a camera. That's my biggest trade secret. I just use my [iPhone] 8 Plus.
Do you have any hot spots in Hamilton that you really like to take photos of?
Bayfront is such an easy place to get inspired 'cause it's always changing, there's always something new. Number two, I would say Locke Street. There's so many different colours and paintings [and] everything looks like it's from a different era.
And number three . . . this one's basic, but I really like Mulberry [Café]. I'm there almost every single day to say hi to my barista friends, but that place is so photogenic. They have these huge windows so lots of good natural light comes in and the actual structure inside is so cute. They have these brick walls and even the lights are adorable.
And then, let me think of a fourth one. Oh! Aberdeen [Street]! Aberdeen has some gorgeous houses, some look like mansions. So, you could pop in an address, look cute and pose."
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
The Silhouette: Could you please give a brief introduction of yourself?
Matthew Thiessen: I'm Matthew Thiessen, an associate professor of religious studies in the faculty of social sciences here at McMaster. I primarily focus on ancient texts, what Christians call the New Testament and text out of ancient Judaism, whether that's the Hebrew Bible, the Old Testamentor early Judaism text that didn't make it into the canon of either Jews or Christians.
When did you first become interested in the topic of the apocalypse and why?
The first time that I can remember something apocalyptic coming across my radar was in 1988. I know this for a fact because I grew up just outside of Detroit on the Canadian border, just outside of Windsor, and my dad took me to my first baseball game and I had been begging to go for years. It was at Tiger Stadium in Detroit. I have no recollection of the game whatsoever, but I do remember a small plane circling around the stadium during the ball game and it had one of those banners. It said: "8 reasons why the world will end in 1988" and I had never heard of such a thing.
It said: "8 reasons why the world will end in 1988" and I had never heard of such a thing. . . I remember thinking that I have no idea what this is talking about, but I sure as heck don't want the world to end.
1988 seems like a lifetime ago, but I guess I was 11 years old at the time. I remember thinking that I have no idea what this is talking about, but I sure as heck don't want the world to end. I'm 11, all I've done is go to school. I haven't reaped any benefits. I haven't got a job or made money or travelled or everything else. So I remember thinking that this is awful: I don't want the world to end because my life hasn't really even begun yet.
And so, that's sort of where I first came across this idea of apocalyptic thinking, the end of the world sort of thinking and [it] just has popped up over and over again. Anybody can, especially thinking in a North American context, come across this kind of stuff. In 2012, there was this claim about the Mayan calendar that predicted the world was going to end. In 2013, there was a Christian pastor in the States who put out billboards all over the world talking about the world ending. And, of course, this stuff keeps happening even today.
Could you elaborate on why you're still interested in this topic?
Especially in the North American context . . . you can see especially the dominance and influence of Christian apocalyptic thinking that still occurs to this day. You'll see, over and over again, predictions about the end of the world or some sort of major apocalyptic event. This includes what happened . . . when numerous Trump supporters stormed the Capitol as some of that was influenced by apocalyptic thinking. There was the thought that there was going to be this major movement by God to keep Trump in power. But this is what some people believed: that God would intervene in American history to bring about what these people thought would be some sort of just and righteous conclusion. Other historical events in the world were also influenced by apocalyptic thinking. It's out there, it pops its head out over and over again, so I think studying this is really important.
Do you believe that there is a key lesson that we can learn from the apocalypses you study?
When you study ancient apocalyptic texts, I think they're motivated by a few key ideological or theological beliefs. One is that what happens here on Earth is ultimately under the control of some higher being. So at least in a North American context, one of the most famous apocalypses of all is the Book of Revelation in the New Testament, in the Christian Bible. It's motivated by the belief that what happens here on earth is controlled by God and that this is a reason to believe — just because life on earth is maybe crappy, things are going bad, people are dying, people are being persecuted, unrighteous people seem to be winning, bad people seem to be ruling — that ultimately, this is not the final word. So this hope that all this will change is what motivates this literature.
I think you see, whether that's been religious or secular apocalyptic thinking today, there's this idea that now is not the final word. Just talking about maybe at the secular level, it's not this belief that there's a God who is going to make things turn out right, but you can see the sort of apocalyptic thinking around climate change. Most climate change activists say that we're very close to midnight, but there's something we can do. So the idea is we're at a very dangerous point but it can change and we can have an effect in changing it for the good. There are many people thinking that we are in an apocalyptic time and that we can change this, we just have to muster the courage to do it. There's the thought about "What can the world be? This is it now, here's what's bad about it, but here's what we can hope for and aspire to and work towards."
There are many people thinking that we are in an apocalyptic time and that we can change this, we just have to muster the courage to do it. There's the thought about "What can the world be? This is it now, here's what's bad about it, but here's what we can hope for and aspire to and work towards."
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
The Silhouette: What is the IMPACT study?
Marla Beauchamp: With the start of COVID-19 and the public health recommendations on social distancing and staying home as much as possible, one of the things that concerned us was: "How could this be affecting older peoples' mobility and their social participation?"
We know that mobility is a really really critical aspect of health for older people and when you lose mobility, you're at risk of falling, of negative health outcomes, of hospitalization. So our team wanted to understand the impact of these social distancing recommendations on peoples' mobility and participation over time.
[/media-credit] Marla Beaucamp
Brenda Vrkljan: Our sample is focused on people in Hamilton and one of the things that we wanted to do with this study was to be very thoughtful about who is gonna be included in the study. We aim to have a random sample, but that's a very loose term because when you say “I want a random sample,” it's not really that random because you still need to obtain informed consent and those kinds of things [and] you still need to recruit people. But what we did was we sampled people in different areas of the city, different economic statuses, different social determinants of health.
How did this study come into existence?
Beauchamp: I do a lot of work with people with chronic Lyme disease. Some of the guidelines for people include that you should remain at home completely, you should not go out at all. And so I was really concerned that we were telling people not to move, right? And I wanted to understand the impact of staying at home and not going about doing their usual activities, what that could do to their health.
So that was part of the reason for doing it. Also, Brenda and I are always talking about ways that we can support older people to live in their homes and to live independently. So if we were going to think more long term about this pandemic, we really needed to understand what has been the impact: what are people doing, what are people noticing?
Vrkljan: Like any good idea, there tends to be what I called the idea stack. So, Marla goes: "I have an idea," and I go: "Oh what if we did this too?". This might draw some other people in too and then what hopefully happens is that it's picked up in a better place. One thing we have is that we involve older adults in our initiatives. Of course, we might talk to our families, but that's not quite the same as talking to somebody who's not so close to us.
Marla and I have parents who are aging. . . and we also had an older adult partner who said that we're asking her lots of questions, but one thing that we're missing out on was the impact of the quarantine. We were missing out on the experience of living through a quarantine. So we've added interviews to our study with questions about their lives before the pandemic, during the pandemic and how they foresee their lives after the pandemic.
We're calling it the trilogy approach — it's not quite Star Wars — but this idea of thinking about your life in segments and trying to understand how people manage is our next step. We want to see what strategies people are using that are helping them do really well and see if those strategies could be implemented to help more people.
We're calling it the trilogy approach — it's not quite Star Wars — but this idea of thinking about your life in segments and trying to understand how people manage is our next step. We want to see what strategies people are using that are helping them do really well and see if those strategies could be implemented to help more people.
What are some highlights from the study so far?
Vrkljan: As an occupational therapist, I'm very interested in things that occupy peoples' time — their ability to do things that are important to them. For example, being able to get out to Tim Horton's could be really important to some people, that could be where you get your socialization. When you can't do those things, it could mean that you're not getting rest, that you're not moving around as much. So together, we're very interested in how people manage their mobility and manage their social participation because we want to leverage that.
Resilience is something . . . interesting as well. It's interesting to see that some of our participants actually reported that they're having such a hard time that they would actually have symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. It's not a diagnosis, but it's a real struggle. Now, we don't know how they were doing before, but we just had their snapshot in time.
[/media-credit] Brenda Vrkljan
Beauchamp: I just want to emphasize that it is a small proportion of people, but obviously concerning still and not nontrivial. Another big concern with our study is that almost half of respondents said that they were very worried about falling and of the people that had a fall in previous years, almost 40% said they had a fall in the last 30 days. That is a high number of calls during a pandemic where you're supposed to be with your family at home and less in the community.
So it just speaks to the fact that if you're less active and you do have problems with mobility, it can really have an impact on your health. These are all routes highlighted by the survey that are going to be important concerns going forward as we come out of the pandemic.
By: Esther Liu, Contributor
The Silhouette: What is a moment that made you a stronger person?
Sowmithree Ragothaman: After I finished my first year [of health sciences at McMaster University], I was looking to apply to jobs so that I could get my first work experience and make some money during the summer so I wouldn't have to be so reliant on my parents. But, I feel like I was really unaccustomed [to] what would be expected of me. I had no clue how to write a resume or a cover letter
I would scroll through millions of jobs on Indeed and all those platforms to try and find something in line with what I was hoping to do in the future, but also something that I would be actually qualified for. Honestly, it was really frustrating and kind of disappointing because I didn't get any responses for months and months on end. I think I just kept trying because I was too proud to admit to myself that maybe I should give up and try to do something else.
I felt like it was the first time where I felt I had been challenged like that . . . I was really upset and I feel like my emotions were all over the place during that summer where I just didn't know what to do with myself. So the next year, I worked on becoming much more involved in the community and I tried my best to go for positions to build up my level of expertise on all the different skills that I wanted to work on instead of being passive about [them] all.
It worked out: I got a job the next summer! I felt a lot more prepared and it was a job that I genuinely enjoyed doing. But I think having that failure in the first summer was what inspired me to start building on my foundations and find other ways to succeed than just the ways I expected.
What is something you’re really passionate about and want to act on?
I'm really interested in making improvements to the education system and to make it more accommodating for students with different learning styles. For a long time, I volunteered with students who were in an alternative learning program. The students I worked with were essentially ones that had difficulty coping with the normal school environment so they were using this alternative pathway to achieve a high school degree.
I really enjoyed interacting with them and I think that the program was beneficial for them overall, but I often felt frustrated by the kind of resources we were given. A lot of it was shifting towards being more tech-based [learning], but there were a lot of [technical] issues . . . So I felt it was really difficult to teach and include technology when the technology didn't even work . . . So looking forward, I really do want to become involved in education at whatever level I can and hopefully advocate for resources that are more accommodating and more suited to every learner.
When you were younger, what did you think you would grow up to be? Has this changed? If so, why?
When I was younger, our school used to have these assemblies. Sometimes students would get a chance to introduce themselves and talk about what they wanted to be when they grew up. I was really influenced by that – anytime anyone said anything, I would go "oh, I want to be that!" So, I feel like my choices would change weekly, cycling from teacher to doctor to lawyer to astronaut.
Then, as I grew a little bit older, I think my main aspiration was always to be an architect. I grew up in Dubai. There are so many different types of buildings and I used to marvel at those. It was really difficult for me to even wrap my head around the fact that it started from a design on a piece of paper and then you see it realized in real life. I also loved drawing, painting and creating with my hands, so I thought that architecture might be a good way to develop and invest in those talents in an actual career.
I also think that at a young age I was really interested in environmental sustainability. So I wanted to become an architect but also encourage sustainable design and architecture through my own design. I stuck to that all throughout high school as well.
The first time that my options changed and that I felt a little less sure about architecture was when I was applying to university programs. Architecture was a no-brainer option — I applied to architecture schools and urban planning schools but I had some doubts at the back of my mind. I think the reason for that was that I always really enjoyed science, the human sciences especially, but I had never really thought about going into anything that was even relevant to healthcare or human services.
But when I was in Grade 12, I had a really really wonderful biology teacher. She saw my interest and she made sure to really nurture it. I realized that architecture wasn't the only option I had and that, on the other hand, going into something healthcare-related worked better in my interests in terms of serving the community and biological sciences. I've also come to realize through that process is that a career option doesn't necessarily have to be something you stick to throughout your whole life and that there's always room for you to change and develop. So I got to be a little less afraid of not getting it right on the first try.
