C/O Christian Braun

Please introduce yourself. 

I am Glenda van der Leeuw. I am a student counselor with McMaster Student Wellness Center and a registered social worker.  

Last summer, you ran a program called "You Belong in the Room" [with McMaster University’s Student Success Centre]. How was it?  

I decided to facilitate "You Belong in the Room" for Black students to create a safe space for them and talk about imposter syndrome from a Black lens. [In the program] we talk about how that sometimes hinders our drive and, often, how our confidence is really harmed when we have self-doubt . . . We're really trying to stress with students that yes, of course the system is broken. We can all acknowledge that. [But] what do we do from here? In order for those systems to be corrected, dismantled or fixed, there needs to be leadership spaces for racialized people in those spaces.  

Another part of the program and my work was learning how to manage the stressors from discrimination. I hope to empower our students [to] learn to love and value their own identity. I'm hoping this group will give a lasting confidence, highlight their value and the unique strengths they bring. Altogether, it also relates to courage. Recognizing your own value can be the instant courage when we’re afraid to take action. It motivates students to seize opportunities and encourages them to step out of their comfort zone to transcend the lack of diversity and racism that's keeping them down. 

Since “You Belong in the Room” has ended, have there been other, similar programs? 

We’ve established the Black X-scape. It’s a support group for students that centers mental health. It's only been running for the last couple weeks and it's a drop-in. When I first facilitated “You Belong in the Room,” I saw these conversations needed to be furthered. So, we created this space where students can reclaim their mental health and have discussions about the barriers they're experiencing. It's all students, a lot of shareable knowledge. That comfort, that support is really valuable. Our wellness is so important, especially when we're experiencing racism. We need a space to talk about these things and unpack them. That's where community really steps in. Community support is so, so important to thriving. It's where we learn, feel safe and also where we can acknowledge how to navigate these spaces. I'm learning from my past and sharing it with the students in a way we can reflect so they can take away something from these experiences and use it to their own advantage. 

What are your goals, both personal and related to your work?  

I always strive to reach my own potential. I have my own imposter syndrome and underlying doubts. We talk about the upper limits that, sometimes, we are afraid to reach. We each have to reflect on our upper limits, our fears and how we can confront them. So, I think I want to do some speeches talking about that in conjunction with anti-Black racism. In terms of the students, the students are just amazing. That's really what I want to do with my own role: use my experiences and create a platform for them to share and express whatever they would like. I'm hoping with Black X-Scape, students will further explore what they need and be able to showcase their skills. 

Have there been any experiences that really stand out to you? 

We talk about celebrating your achievements, something that really internalizes confidence. It prepares you for the next challenge. When you reflect back on all of your skills, your assets, what prepared you for this moment. When I think about that, I feel overall just happy with myself and my drive despite the struggles and barriers I’ve overcome. This last year at McMaster has been a whole new journey for me. I'm really excited to see what McMaster has in store, to expand on the potential and go from there. Not to mention, I’ve really enjoyed learning from my Black elders. Listening to them has created positivity for me and informs how I’m moving forward, understanding my role as a learner and as a leader, developing further understanding and honouring our identities. That's what I aim to do in my space: honouring students' intersectionalities, their whole identity. It's so important to live completely in your own identity and be confident. 

C/O Mike Wong

The Silhouette: Please introduce yourself. 

Mike Wong: My name is Mike Wong and I'm an assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Neurosciences. 

What inspires you to research what you do? 

Personal and interpersonal experiences. I think I'm at a point in my life where I don't want to do things that aren't meaningful to me. I'm fascinated by neuroplasticity. I'm fascinated with research in all the areas I've done in the past but I've gotten to a point where I want to do things that are also meaningful to people on a broader scale. For example, stress-related research. I teach and stress comes up a lot. Feelings of burnout or being overwhelmed is something students really struggle with. I always try to think back to when I was a student and I definitely struggled with that. With this work, eventually, I'd like to use it for recommendations to student wellness centres to find different strategies for students. With the educational practices, I'm interested in getting the word out there to make our classes more inclusive, to make our classes less stressful. What can we do as instructors to improve the student experience? How do we build a community, how do we reduce stress and how do we support students as they go through what is arguably one of the most difficult chapters in their lives? I find that really, really meaningful. 

 What can we do as instructors to improve the student experience? How do we build a community, how do we reduce stress and how do we support students as they go through what is arguably one of the most difficult chapters in their lives?

You said in a previous interview that if you didn't pursue science that you might want to go into culinary arts. Has this changed? 

I struggled a lot with what I wanted to do as a career in my third and fourth years. I went all over the place. I had a really big interest in ancient Greco-Roman history, I actually wanted to do [graduate school] in ancient history. I thought about politics. I thought about business. I thought about teaching at a high school level. I had a huge list and I made a spreadsheet of all the pros and cons of all the different careers I could see myself in.  

Another part of me wanted to leave academia, wanted to leave science. I looked into the real estate world. I looked into culinary arts. I was exploring. My brother always wanted to be a chef but he never did so that trickled in my mind. If I were to ever leave academia, I think I would still consider becoming a chef and going into the culinary world. I love food. I love plating my food. There's just everything about food that I love. It makes me so happy. 

Do you have any advice you’d like to share? 

I won't frame it as giving advice, I'd frame it just from personal experience. You can plan and plan and plan but sometimes the unexpected happens. When I hear the word success and I hate the word success, I'm always reminded of this diagram where you have the word success and you see a linear arrow. When we look at people and I know I am guilty of that, too, you see someone who seems really put together and you think they're so successful, they're so smart. But I think for most people, that journey isn't linear. There are a lot of these twists and turns. That learning journey is very messy and life is no different. I remember when I was an undergrad, I thought “Oh, I'm going to finish undergrad, I'll do some postgraduate work and I'll get a job and everything is going to be great and dandy.” But that isn't my experience. I've had to face a lot of ups and downs over the years but I've learned to really trust the process. Things will work out in the end. It may not be what you expect, but I think it will work out. It may be tough at times but I'm a true believer that things do work out in the end.  

The other thing I've learned is to let the journey take you; let the journey guide you. I think sometimes we get tunnel vision. We think, “This is what I want and I'm going to focus all my experiences on this end goal.” But I think by doing that, we're sometimes depriving ourselves of all the other experiences that could have been. I know uncertainty is scary, but there's almost a beauty to that because rather than funnelling all your experiences to this angle, you're allowing yourself to explore all of these different opportunities that can ultimately lead you to something that may be more meaningful to you.

I know uncertainty is scary, but there's almost a beauty to that because rather than funnelling all your experiences to this angle, you're allowing yourself to explore all of these different opportunities that can ultimately lead you to something that may be more meaningful to you.  

The Silhouette: Please introduce yourselves. 

Hilary Menezes: My name is Hilary Menezes. I'm a third-year student at McMaster and I'm currently pursuing an English and cultural studies degree with a minor in political science and a certificate in leadership.  

Madison Menezes: I'm Madison and I'm in my second year of mechanical and biomedical engineering. 

Please elaborate on the Love Packs project. 

HM: Love Packs was started in the pandemic around Valentine's Day last year . . . We realized that there are a lot of people who are super generous and donate around Christmas time and holiday season. But, moving into the new year, we realized that there weren't really many supports for those facing homelessness or abuse [and] in shelters . . . So, when my work hosted a goal funder, we came up with Love Packs. When we were stuck at home during the pandemic, we wanted to pick up something actionable. That was the main driving force. Just hearing about the reactions of all of the women and children and homeless folks that we provided for inspired us to continue it to be more than a one-time initiative. We ended up getting to do another one in the summer and now we're taking it into 2022. 

MM: Just thinking about the degree of how much more difficult the pandemic is for someone living in a shelter was also part of my reason for wanting to really help. We just wanted to make sure that we could provide them with things that they could use day to day and then also other gifts that would make them happier. 

HM: To add on, something kind of unique about Love Packs is we tried to go beyond things like toilet paper, deodorant, toothbrushes and toothpaste. We provide that but we also try to include little gifts. We wanted to give people things that they might consider to be luxuries and might not have access to. These are actual people who deserve to be celebrated. So, we had the opportunity last year to give some fun gifts like makeup, snack packs and different kinds of fancy coffees and teas. We had Starbucks donate some fancy coffee. We really try to incorporate that into our philosophy of not only just giving the essentials but trying to go a little bit above and beyond that. 

Could you guys talk a little bit more about the Love Packs team? 

HM: Last year we did it with just the two of us in our basement. Especially with COVID, it was one of the things where we thought that we can't get more hands because at that point, vaccines weren't so much a thing and cases were through the roof. Still, it was great to see so many people text me. We even had some friends from middle school who we hadn't talked to in five years offer donations. It was cool to see people helping in that capacity. Even then, two or three of my close friends and our parents helped us transport different things when we had super large donations or for the final trip when we brought everything to the shelters. Our communities helped out a lot and we were so grateful. That inspired us to make it bigger this year and grow the team. We’re gaining some traction and are actively recruiting volunteers right now. In fact, we just hired our [executive] team because we want to grow this to reach out to more people this year and give Love Packs to more people. 

How have you guys been feeling about just the General McMaster community then? And I guess the communities that you've been interacting with as a whole 

MM: I started at McMaster without really having been on campus. But I found it fascinating even with online learning. It's just a really welcoming environment and I definitely found a lot of people who are happy to connect. We've even had one of the local doughnut shops, Donut Monster, donate to our project. It was just really nice to see people in Hamilton contributing as well. 

HM: It's been amazing to see how many people from McMaster have either donated to us or businesses have supported us. Actually, the guy who drove the doughnuts from Donut Monster to our home in Mississauga, I met him through mock trial at McMaster. So, I had only known him for maybe not even a year through meetings once a week. But he still said that he'd do it. It was great to see how people are so willing to help out. 

C/O Pasha Malla

The Silhouette: Please introduce yourself. 

Pasha Malla: My name is Pasha Malla. I’m the 2021-2022 Mabel Pugh Taylor Writer in Residence. I'm also teaching a class in [the arts and science department], a special inquiry class on speculative fiction.  

What is your role as the Writer in Residence?  

I'm available to the McMaster community and the broader Hamilton community via the Hamilton Public Library for manuscript consultations, which means that people send me excerpts of their work, poetry or prose and I read them and give them some feedback. Then we have a meeting on Zoom and have a little conversation about it. That's part of it. The other half of the program is various workshops and talks. Tonight, I have a workshop on suspense and urgency that I'm posting on Zoom. I'm doing the art of writing workshops through the Hamilton Public Library and business writing workshops through [McMaster University].  

How have your meetings been so far?  

I've been having the best time. Because the program includes people outside the [McMaster] community, regular old folks from wherever can join as long as they're affiliated with Hamilton in some way. It's been a really nice and diverse group of people and quite a nice variety of kinds of writing that folks are doing. It's been really encouraging and inspiring and kind of fun to read for people and have conversations with folks who are at various stages in their writing. I'm working with some published writers and some new writers. It has been really enjoyable in all kinds of ways.  

What inspires you to write?  

Lots of different things. Writing has been a nice place to just experience a little bit of joy. I've been working on this project that just makes me laugh and I have fun working on. Each project has its own goals and intentions or whatever else and results.

Lately, writing for me, it's been a nice little diversion and a place that I go for laughs. I make myself laugh, which is kind of weird, but nice when you can make it happen.  

Do you mind elaborating on the project?  

It's actually a sequel to the last novel I had out which is called Kill The Mall. It's an absurdist story with supernatural elements. This is a sequel to that, it's actually the second book in what I think is probably going to be a trilogy and I'm going to finish it before reading week, probably.  

Are there any people or another writer who inspires you in writing?  

There are so many writers whose work I read who are just so far beyond what I'm doing. I find that trying to achieve things that other writers are doing is motivating. Most recently, I've been reading a writer from Argentina whose name is Juan José Saer. I'm just blown away by this guy's genius. Reading something like that makes me, as a writer, try to pick it apart and see how he's doing what he's doing. So yeah, I get inspired by reading a lot.  

Have you encountered any challenges in your own writing or within the Writers in Residence program?  

No, this program has been terrific. That's a testament to how great the people who are sending their work in, who I've been meeting with and [who] have been attending these workshops with [all] are. That's the reason why I did it. If there's any challenge, it's just seeing each piece to try to figure out what the writer is trying to do and then doing my best to help them get there. Giving different suggestions and feedback that will be, I hope, encouraging and motivating but at the same time rigorous constructive criticism.  

Is there anything you would like to say to aspiring writers?  

Go into engineering school so you can get a job. No, I'm just being facetious. I think there's all kinds of generic advice already. You know, you should read, you should write. For me, I think being a curious person in the world is the most important thing. To ask questions, to speculate, to wonder. To tap into that thing we all had when we were kids where there's so much imagination and possibility is a large part of who you are and how you engage with the world. I think that is more important than figuring out the craft. Really being curious, engaging in curiosity about other people, about places, about experiences, about yourself.

The Silhouette: Please introduce yourselves.

HL: I'm Hannah Laycock and I am President of Mac Crafters.

KD: I'm Kelly Deeth and I'm the Vice President Finance for Mac Crafters.

AS: I'm Amr Saleh and I'm the VP Finance of Senior with Skills.

ZA: I'm Zoe Ang and I'm one of the VP Events for Senior with Skills.

Can you elaborate on your Holiday Letters event?

ZA: We wanted to host a collaborative event where we could make holiday cards for seniors and then eventually donate them to senior homes. We were in a Zoom call making the cards together. We have a drop-off box on campus so whoever made cards can drop them off and then we'll send them out to a senior home. We're going to be scanning some of the physical cards and making them into a book so we can reach more homes as well.

AS: From the point of view of Seniors with Skills, one of our main missions is to combat senior isolation, especially during the pandemic. When Mac Crafters reached out to us, we thought this opportunity just perfectly aligned with our missions and goals. 

What were your goals for this event?

AS: We just recognized that during this time, especially during the pandemic, a lot of seniors can feel quite lonely, especially due to things like COVID restrictions; maybe they might not have the same number of guests [or] maybe they just can't see their family as often. Hopefully, through these cards, we can say that people are thinking of them and we hope they can feel a little bit more included in the community.

HL: We really also notice that the holidays don't really feel the same on campus, especially with the restrictions. We really wanted to do something that could unite the fellow crafters.

Do you have a favorite memory from your club experiences?

AS: This event has been my most memorable experience so far just because our mission is all about trying to tackle the senior isolation that many in Hamilton might be facing. Putting together an event and seeing a tangible end outcome of the cards that we can then give to the seniors was something I found really, really rewarding.

KD: This event was so fun. It was a great chance to meet people from other clubs and meet general club members, seeing that even in an event that seems rather simplistic such as making holiday cards, everybody really does bring something different to the table. People can show that by doing something virtually or being good at art or hand lettering, as Zoe mentioned. It just showcases that even with something that seems simple and straightforward, everyone brings something different.

Do you have any big takeaways from this event in particular?

HL: For Mac Crafters, it's definitely the importance of giving back to the community. Really being able to see that in action was great, especially since we haven't been able to do that much from an online environment for such a long time. It's really an impactful thing. It's just such a warming feeling — it brings people together and, especially at this time of year, it's a wonderful thing to do.

ZA: I think that this event has opened my eyes up to more volunteering opportunities. Even though we haven't given the cards to the seniors yet, just the event itself and people coming together for the reason of helping others made it really nice to be in that call with everyone. It was amazing to be with everyone working together and taking time out of their days to help out. Hopefully, when the seniors get the cards, we can also see what they think and see their reactions.

AS: Just how much of a difference small actions can make. Taking an hour out of your day to make cards [for] seniors who might be feeling socially isolated can make a really, really big difference. I'm really looking forward to seeing the reaction from seniors once they do eventually get the cards.

KD: A lot of times with Mac Crafters, a lot of our focus can be on our own students, our own club members and mental health. That's such an amazing and really important cause in and of itself. But it was really nice for this event to shift the focus to something outside of the McMaster community and to the senior community, which is also so important.

By: Esther Liu, Humans of McMaster Staff Writer

Please introduce yourself.

Santee Smith, Tekaronhiáhkhwa iónkiats, Kahnyen’kehàka, niwakonhwentsio:ten, Wakeniáhten. Ohswekén nitewaké:non.  

My name is Santee Smith, Tekaronhiáhkhwa, I’m from the Kahnyen’kehàka Nation, Turtle Clan from Ohswekén also known as Six Nations of the Grand River. I have a long connection to McMaster University, first as an undergraduate student in the faculty of physical education and psychology. [Now], I am the current chancellor of McMaster University.

Please give a brief description of what you do as the chancellor and at the Kaha:wi Dance Theatre.

I'm also the artistic director of the Kaha:wi Dance Theatre. Kaha:wi in the Mohawk language means to carry. We are a performing arts organization who is really focused on embodied storytelling and sharing Indigenous narratives that are often underrepresented or misrepresented in popular mainstream culture. 

As chancellor, I have the honorary position of being the head of the university. I am responsible for convocation, my name is on every single student's diploma. I am also the chair of the honorary degree committee and I also am a speaker at events. For example, the upcoming Remembrance Day event, I'll be delivering a message and [am] responsible for any other messaging and connection to faculties that would like the chancellor there to connect with the students, staff and faculty.

What inspired you to go into this work?

It was an invitation. I have a very back-and-forth connection to academia. I have a professional artistic career but also my background is supported through two degrees at McMaster University and a master's degree from York University. One of the interesting things about being a chancellor at McMaster University is that you have to be a McMaster alumna, so I fit the hat. 

Also, I had a connection over the years to the president's office and especially past president Patrick Deane, who visited Six Nations, who visited my family. I also have connections to the Indigenous studies department. Recently in 2018, [I was] a part of the Socrates project which brought in community artists and speakers to share their work with the McMaster campus. So I was in-residency through Socrates and the Indigenous studies department and that's really how I became even more present in McMaster. 

The work that I was doing as part of that was called the Mush Hole. The Mush Hole is a performance that shares the history of Canada's first residential school called the Mohawk Institute Residential School. My job not only as a creative, but as an Indigenous artist, is to share that truth and to educate others. I was invited by Patrick Deane to consider being chancellor. That was a wonderful surprise and something that I didn't plan for or didn't know was coming down the road for me in my life. So I gave it some important thought because of what I can contribute, especially due to my very busy artistic career, but also the important parts of representing the Indigenous and representing the arts and experiences that I would bring forward as chancellor.

What inspired you to become involved with the Kaha:wi Dance Theatre?

I was a dance artist and my training is in classical ballet. Since I was little, I attended the National Ballet School for six years. And then really, when I was a teenager, thinking about identity and being away from my home community and family, I felt something was missing. And I returned home. Then I pursued academics, but nothing really filled that passion and drive for performing arts. 

The first opportunity I had to be creative and create choreography based on stories that are within my culture, I put two things together: my love of performance and body storytelling and sharing about my culture and being an Ohswekén Indigenous woman. My first choreography was in 1996. Since that time, I have been dedicated to creating, introducing new work and sharing with audiences around the world. Collaborating is a big part of it, being able to share with Indigenous and non-Indigenous collaborators.

What are your goals as Chancellor and as a dancer?

My goal for both is Indigenous representation and visibility. It's nice to see even for myself, people in positions that are — I don't want to say powerful in a colonial hierarchical power way, but that they're in positions of prestige and influence in offering that different perspective, in offering Indigenous perspective. For example, when I was growing up and studying classical ballet, I didn't have any role models who were Indigenous, except for one: Maria Tallchief. She was from the United States and she was a prima ballerina dancer. 

My parents showed me her and wanted me to have an Indigenous role model. So I think that representation is really important, that offering different perspectives and stories, narratives that come from this land, Turtle Island, is really important. I want to do that as Chancellor, as an artist, as a speaker and offer that out both for role modelling within Indigenous communities and for everyone.

Do you have a favourite memory as chancellor?

For being chancellor, it was my installation in November 2019. That was the first time I became officially chancellor. Being a part of that ceremony and putting on my robes for the first time, being in the presence of all the graduates and the faculty on the stage and being able to hear the singing of my Indigenous colleagues and being dressed in robes with students within the Indigenous faculty. I would have to say that was a major highlight — a major life highlight — it was a bit surreal and it has a very ceremonial feeling to it.

Do you have a favourite memory regarding dance?

I had so many dance memories. Because all of my experiences are quite different and all of my productions are quite different, it would be hard to choose one. I love performing and I love performing artists. I just feel like out of all of the times of performing, the experience of falling into performance and being able to share with audiences in an 100 per cent committed, talk-inspired and dedicated way is why I do what I do.

Do you have a big takeaway from your experiences or message to others?

I think the biggest takeaway, for myself personally, that I continue to hold, is lifelong learning. Learning is never-ending. It keeps you inspired. It keeps you curious. It keeps you asking questions and developing and transforming. So, I hope to continue to be a lifelong learner. And I encourage everybody else to find that for themselves as well.

C/O Robyn Sidhu

The Silhouette: Please introduce yourself.

Robyn Sidhu: My name is Robyn, my pronouns are he/she/they and I'm a fifth-year student at [McMaster University] in the [political science department] and I'm double majoring in peace studies and attempting to minor in gender studies.

When did you first get into poetry?

I was in grade 10 [and] for a civics assignment, we had to do a creative project that had to do with a social justice issue my teacher gave us. I decided to do poetry and I think queerness. This was also when I was still in the closet so I was like, “let me test the waters, let's see how these folks think about the gays.” That same year I started slamming with the Brampton poetry slam. That doesn't exist anymore; it only lasted a couple years, unfortunately. But I loved it. I was writing really angsty poetry that was definitely not good at all, but I really loved it. Then I came to Mac and I heard about the Burlington slam project. I ended up joining the team and being able to go to a couple different festivals, which was really cool. I got to go to Dallas, [Texas] in my first year for the International Women's Poetry Slam and this was also before I came out as nonbinary, [so] I identified as a woman when I went. I got to go to Chicago for the National Poetry Slam out there which is super cool and only three Canadian teams get to go — the Burlington, Toronto and Vancouver teams. I also ended up going to the Canadian festival for Spoken Word in my second year, which was in Guelph. That's how I got to know the national scene and then the American scene and kept writing.

Do you have any goals in regards to your work?

It's kind of weird. Once the pandemic happened, I've taken a step back from writing and now I teach [more]. I work with this charity in Toronto called CANVAS. We do consent education training in schools and workplaces and queer identity training in schools, camps, workplaces and stuff like that. Through CANVAS, I run a poetry program for [femme and misogyny-affected] youth and shelter spaces. For the past two years, I've been running this program . . . Every year, I get to meet so many wonderful youth who come through the program and write and foster and create that space. That is something that I love doing more than actually performing and writing. We put together a book every year called the Back Talk Collective. My real poetry goal is to expand that program . . . I want to expand that. I want to do a queer-specific stream; I want to do a stream for boys and masc [folks]; I want to do a trans only stream; I want to keep teaching . . . I love doing it. All of our sessions are about some part of our identity or experience. We try to weave a lot of other art forms into the session like collaging, poetry and music. We do performances together and we pay whoever comes to perform. We really strive to not just create that safe space in session, but also as an organization, [to] really invest in our youth and our artists. So, we’ve implemented this new thing where if you're submitting to any literary magazine and there's a paywall to submit, we'll cover that. Or if you're wanting to go to other workshops that are arts-related and there's a paywall, let us know and we'll pay for it. That's been one of the things that I've really tried to foster because I don't just want people to come to my session and then do poetry; I want them to invest in themselves.

Have there been any obstacles that you've encountered with poetry or any of your work?

I run a poetry slam series in Toronto called Hot Damn it's a Queer Slam. It's Canada's only queer circuit for queer people by queer people. The pandemic has forced us online. We haven't been able to meet together in person. Everybody's Zoomed out and nobody wants to go to Zoom events so we found that our poetry slams, our open mics and the workshops we've been hosting have been pretty intimate. They're not getting as many people as they normally would have. That's been kind of a step back, but also the beautiful thing about Zoom is that everybody can join, no matter where they're from if you have Internet access. We've been seeing a lot more disabled folks come and join our sessions because you can log on and you don't have to physically go anywhere. We've had people from across the world join our workshops, which has been really weird and really good because we never would have met [them] otherwise, but now [they’re] from London and [they’re] in this workshop on a random Saturday. 

Do you have any favourite poems?

Sonya Renee Taylor and it's called The Body is Not an Apology. Gorgeous, phenomenal. It's about how you don't have to apologize for existing and you having a body is a joyous reckoning. Sonya Renee Taylor also has a website and an organization called The Body is Not an Apology. It's a movement about reclaiming your body as a disabled person, reclaiming your skin as a racialized person and then it's just a phenomenal organization and movement. Another poet that I absolutely adore, but, unfortunately, have never been able to meet, is Melissa Lozada-Oliva and she is phenomenal. She's a [Latin] writer and she's got this poem called Black Thong Underwear. 

Do you have any favourites of your own?

Falling in Love with a Poet. I just love roasting shitty men I've dated and that one is so close to home. When I read it for other poets, they're like, "wow, you're really calling me out" and well, we all do this stuff, so. Then I've got another poem I wrote in my first year that's called Sunflowers and Rooftops and I usually perform it with my ukulele. I know four chords on the ukulele and I milk them all. It's about this first-year romance I kind of had but I exaggerated in my head.

Do you have takeaways from your work, your experiences or just even from poetry itself? 

I think the biggest takeaway from poetry has been that anybody can be a good writer. As long as you foster it, especially with teaching. There's this thing I teach called the responsibility of the storyteller. [It’s] the idea that we're all experts of our own narrative, but we shouldn't be writing each other's stories; write what you know [and] write what you've experienced. It's been really interesting to see people writing such specific stories to their own experiences and then seeing other people relate to that. It makes me feel not alone. Poetry brings so many people together. If I read a random poem out and somebody I never met before relates to it, that's a shared moment and I love those shared moments. I love how such specific stories in my own life can resonate with other people and vice versa. Also, putting your heart into it and trying really can get you somewhere. You know, with being able to go to all the festivals, being able to meet so many wonderful people and being able to run a slam myself. It's just my wildest dreams come true.

C/O @nthenyoudie_

Hamilton-native Paulo Leon discusses the evolution of his music and where his drive to pursue his passion has led

By: Edwin Thomas, Contributor

Music has been a significant influence  throughout Paulo Leon’s life. Chilean folk music and poetry was the soundtrack of his childhood. His mother, Nancy, was a guitarist and singer for a Chilean folk band in Kitchener, while his father, Marco, was an avid hip-hop fan and introduced him to Snoop Dogg, Dr. Dre and Gustavo Cerati, an Argentinian psychedelic singer-songwriter. 

In the eighth grade, Leon spent a lot of his time around his older brother, Gabriel and his brother’s friends. He admired their ability to freestyle rap with each other. Gabriel eventually took Leon under his wing and inspired Leon to make beats for his raps.

Leon taught himself FL studio using a combination of YouTube tutorials and experimentation. This do-it-yourself mentality became a core value he would carry forward in his music and into his label later on. His beats then were inspired by the music he listened to at the time — Donald Glover’s Because the Internet, Kanye West’s Yeezus, J. Cole’s Born Sinner and Coldplay’s X&Y. 

Around this time, his mother also pushed him to write and perform with the Hamilton Youth Poets. Paulo was initially hesitant to participate. He was always a shy kid but had an innate desire to perform. He was encouraged by his first slam poetry performance, which was well received by the audience. 

“People were responding to me, to what I was saying on stage,” said Leon. “People snapped and people yelled, ‘that was a bar’ in the crowd. That was really the moment when I was feeding off of it, I liked when people were enjoying my work.”

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His time with the Hamilton Youth Poets improved his confidence performing in public and taught him to feel more comfortable expressing his true self. 

In high school, Leon would also write poetry during independent study time in class. He found his creative flow was best during class. 

“The best part [of writing] for me is when the world feels like it’s going past you,” said Leon. 

Over time, he transitioned from writing poetry to writing rap songs. Leon started making beats for his raps, though he would not publish them initially.  His first songs were heavily influenced by Kanye’s stripped-down, soulful style. It was also during his time in high school where he released Glass Plates, his first single. He recalled being excited when people in his high school were listening to it. 

“That feeling still sticks – getting excited that people are tuning in,” said Leon.

“That feeling still sticks – getting excited that people are tuning in.”

paulo leon, musician

Leon released his first album, Casablanca, in 2017. Casablanca’s reflective storytelling coupled with powerful instrumentals made it a strong alternative hip-hop record. Leon was heavily inspired by Jay-Z’s discography and Kanye’s production style, seen on songs such as Calling it Quits. 

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Leon enrolled in McMaster University’s Humanities program for English and Cultural Studies in 2019 with plans to become an English teacher. He became more comfortable with singing in public by performing in the half-circle sing-alongs in the courtyard between Matthews Hall, Moulton Hall and Wallingford Hall. During first year, he was surrounded by musically-inclined peers who also helped propel his growth as a singer, encouraging him to try new things and step outside his comfort zone.

During the pandemic, Leon was not able to perform, losing his main source of income. He also struggled with the lack of opportunities to collaborate with other musicians due to COVID-19 restrictions. 

At this time, he was at a crossroads with what he wanted his future to look like. On one hand, he wanted to follow his passion and focus on his music career. On the other hand, he wanted to continue studying at McMaster because it was a more secure option for him. Ultimately, he chose to defer from McMaster and this was a pivotal moment in Leon’s life. 

“I decided to defer from McMaster to throw myself into my work and spend my time, money and energy into something I was passionate about,” said Leon. 

His decision to leave McMaster and pursue his passion was the inspiration behind his 2020 album, Partly Stabilized, Partly Curious. 

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A typical day for Leon now consists of working all day with fellow collaborators from the label, Whak and Mo, in the home studio of his parents’ house. Besides working on music, Paulo would also work with andthenyoudie’s releases. The consistency in Leon’s work life is a structure he emphasizes.

“Always keep creating,” said Leon. “I’ve suffered from writer’s block. You have to feel the block but also don’t be afraid to keep creating.” 

Drawing from his own life, he offered further advice to other future artists.

“Do not hesitate to get uncomfortable, be yourself,” said Leon. “And don’t hesitate to reach out to others around you for help or feedback. A lot of my time was spent not playing [music] for anybody, just because I was nervous.”

“Do not hesitate to get uncomfortable, be yourself. And don’t hesitate to reach out to others around you for help or feedback. A lot of my time was spent not playing [music] for anybody, just because I was nervous.”

paulo leon, musician

Leon is now working on his next album, Mr. Show Missed his Show, a reflective album of Leon’s decision to jump into music. Over the pandemic, he took a liking to folk and psychedelic rock, as well as getting into Tame Impala, The Beatles, Violent Femmes and Joy Division. The psychedelic aspect of Tame Impala’s music will be featured in his upcoming album, along with more singing and guitar production. He is looking forward to releasing and performing the album, which comes out in late September. In the meantime, his prior work can be found here.

C/O Rosie Merante

The Silhouette: Please introduce yourself.

Rosie Merante: I'm Rosie Merante. I'm doing nursing at McMaster [University] and it's just the basic Bachelor of Science for your RN [Registered Nurse certificate]. I've had placement every semester, except for one that got pushed to the summer because of [the COVID-19 pandemic]. But I've been in placement for the full three years. . . First year I was in long-term care, second year I was at Joseph Brant [Hospital] in Burlington and I was in the orthopedic surgical unit. Then I had Idlewyld Manor for long-term care. I was in the secure unit there, so it was kind of the [more agitated patients] with dementia or Alzheimer's. Now I'm [in] mental health and forensics.

What do you do [in that placement]?

I just started last week . . .but I got a really good grasp because I was there for 14 hours. Those are the shifts once a week. It's not as much physical head to toe assessment that I would have [done] last year because it's more focused on mental health and these patients have been there for a long time, years even. . .But the majority of it is vitals, doing rounds. It's high security. We have to watch them since they're all coming right from the court system and they weren't deemed fit to stand trial due to their mental illness. It's mostly just that and then most of the assessments we do are mental status examinations and things along [those lines]. We're making sure that they're not going to be a danger to themselves or others and that they're taking their meds and everything's okay.

Do you know how it would have been different if it weren't for COVID-19?

I think now that the regulations are lifting, I'm already noticing some differences from my past placements. We no longer have to wear face shields or get tested every other shift. One thing that I noticed is relationships with people. Obviously, with the pandemic, people are still always going to be paranoid about getting close together and having visitors. So the visiting policy is way restricted right now. They allow one visitor per day for each patient but it's still a big difference from what it was before. I think that's such an issue, especially for mental health. I feel they should lessen the restrictions or increase the amount of visitors allowed because these people are already going through so much, and even if a lot of them don't have family or friends, the ones that do and can receive that support. I feel it would be as beneficial as medical treatment if they could actually see people they love and care about. A lot of them are depressed too because they can't really go out as much and do things that they used to. And they're confined [and] they get privileges to go out, to go around the hospital, to go outside to do things if they're on good behaviour. There's obviously a lot of precautions we have to take but they're allowed to leave. And now, with [COVID-19], that's reduced a lot. A lot of them just end up at the front desk and they're like "Do I have my privileges? Yeah? Look, I want to leave. I'm so bored." That's also kind of what I noticed. At least in the mental health aspect, I think the biggest impact is on the visitor policy . . .At the long-term care homes, I was at three of them, I noticed a big shift with [COVID-19] because of the visitors, privileges to go outside, and for even people from outside to come in and do activities with them, as well as just the residents being close around each other, it's not as good as it used to be. There's a lot less socializing and togetherness, there's a lot more confusion because they don't necessarily understand what's going on and that actually increases some of their behavioural symptoms. They can be very agitated because they don't fully understand why they need to wear a mask, why they need to stay inside, why certain people can't come in [or] why their family stopped visiting. It's hard for them to grasp these concepts on top of the memory loss. That's also what I noticed at some long-term care placements. I'm seeing, just observationally, what seems to be a higher incidence of depression in the elderly.

Is there anything that you're really looking forward to in your current placement?

I'm really looking forward to getting to know [the patients]. The patients aren't in and out, they've been there, so knowing their stories, knowing them more personally, so I can help care for them better.

Do you have any big takeaways from your experiences in your program or your placements?

I don't know, there's so many of them. One of them is to treat the patient or think of them, not in an unprofessional way, as someone from your family or as a friend. Be empathetic. Remember that they're not just a patient. They're a person with dignity and they're your client. It could be your mother, your grandmother. You need to treat them with respect and dignity. I know that the culture of long-term care homes, at least, is very poor quality care. They [the patients] need so many more RNs and [personal support workers] so that they can be more valued and treated with more dignity and respect.

Silhouette graduates reflect on what being part of the Sil has meant to them

_{C/O Baim Hanif}

By: Esther Liu, Contributor